RFK Jr vows to make all American hands smaller than their faces to avoid cancer risk – The Chaser
chaser.com.au
“Every day I walk into the FDA they tell me that if my hand is bigger than my face, I’ll get cancer. Then I check and somehow my hand hits my face, distracting me from knowing if I will get cancer.”

World renowned medical expert Robert F Kennedy Jr has made a vow to all Americans to make their hands smaller to avoid the risk of cancer.

“I’ve spoken to many of the best medical experts I know,” he said in a rousing speech, “and have come to the conclusion that we must act fast.”

“Every day I walk into the FDA they tell me that if my hand is bigger than my face, I’ll get cancer. Then I check and somehow my hand hits my face, distracting me from knowing if I will get cancer.” […]

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