Men do sometimes have boobs, and women tend not to find them attractive (some do ofc) because they are a sign of a poorly maintained body.

If they were a normal feature both sexes had regardless of health, like women sort of do (tho it is still absolutely based on health and hormone levels so this is kinda disingenuous) it would probably be like nice legs or nice butts; one can appreciate nice ones but it wouldn’t be a secondary sex characteristic anymore, so neither sex would be likely to have the present level of obsession with them.

I don’t think women would be particularly concerned with breasts if men had them, too… for one thing even lesbian women don’t tend to get super giddy about breasts now because they are exposed to them a lot more readily and less sexually than men are, so they just aren’t special in any way, even if they are a lesbian’s preferred physical characteristic. This would become true for men as well re:female breasts, but more than that, I can’t really think of any male physical trait that similar numbers of women like the way men like breasts. And I doubt breasts would end up being it for women.

It’s kinda amusing if you think about it but men are absolutely obsessed with genitalia and sex in a way women just aren’t, usually, and that translates to being absolutely obsessed with one’s own penis, such that it -is- a big chunk of the male personality (for the record I’m not saying this disparagingly, I find the differences to be fascinating as a fellow ace, and just listened to a book about erectile dysfunction where this exact tendency is mentioned many time for its usefulness as a diagnostic tool to determine if ED is caused by physical or hormonal issues). And along with that obsession with their own genitalia being the obvious appendage of all their musings, comes a twin obsession with a single highly obvious female body trait, breasts.

Women just don’t operate like that at all. Maybe it’s socializing, maybe it’s inherent, but either way, I don’t think breasts on men for women (or any other trait, frankly) would or even could be like breasts on women for men. I think the problem is that male secondary sex characteristics are basically optional. Men basically get body hair, bad smells, a lump on the throat, and the ability to put on muscle more easily. Other than the Adam’s apple, which isn’t particularly prominent, none of those things are necessarily permanent. You can shave and shower and if you don’t use your muscles they fade, so men don’t have “one major trait”, like breasts, and women are thus more varied about the trait they find most attractive.

For the other questions - women shirtless normal? I mean that’s just a socializing thing. There have been cultures where women are topless just as readily as men and it’s nbd. This is entirely puritanical nonsense.

For breast cancer color - did you know pink used to be a boys color and blue girls? I see no reason the color couldn’t stay pink. But if it was a big deal for both sexes I don’t think it would ever have risen to the sort of prominance it has in society now. Breast cancer as a big deal is because of women making it a big deal because it disproportionately impacts women and men don’t tend to advocate for women’s issues. But if both sexes were impacted it would be more like lung cancer or something, just sort of non-gendered PSAs about your boobs trying to kill you.

Here’s a fun thought experiment in similar spirits.

If complex intelligent life evolved an an encrusted ocean moon (like Europa, which has liquid ocean topped by miles of ice crust, preventing any light or anything from penetrating to the depths), what would their technology look like, and what would their view of the universe be like?

Alternatively, we do away with non-alcoholic pre-mixed beverages entirely, which are mostly water, replacing them with something like fountain machines or even powder mix. Like a kurig or soda stream but instead of using single-serve containers, it uses a refillable glass tube (or something) of concentrate and meters it out as needed, and uses refillable co2 containers, for example.

Another option is to do on-site, on-demand filling, like what breweries do with glass growlers. You bring a glass or stainless steel gallon or half gallon jug, they do a rinse with sanitizing water, fill it up, and send you on your way. We could even bring back swing top bottles for individual servings (I have like 50 of those and they are amazing for beer and kombucha), and just use local or on-site bottling.

There are lots of options that don’t involve single-use plastics, and also don’t involve tons of extra shipping costs. We just have to incentivize making that switch at the company/producer level, rather than the consumer level. Like reusable bags. If the polluting option isn’t an option, people will adjust.

Aluminum isn’t really a great option either. Modern cans have to be lined with a coating of plastic to avoid corrosion. Sure it’s a super thin coating, but it’s plastic all the same (and can contain some pretty nasty largely unregulated chemicals like PFAS)

I’m here for glass, though, and maybe we’ll find a good replacement for the lining in cans if plastic bottles aren’t allowed.

He’s going to do that anyway, whether it’s allowed or not. His plan is to break the country by any means necessary. What actual difference does it make to trumps plans if Biden keeps doing his job until he’s not in that job anymore?

The answer is none whatever.

So the sitting president shouldn’t be allowed to keep doing things they have been doing for years, just because it’s close to an election and someone unrelated might do something else after getting elected?

That’s stupid. Sorry but it is. It’s the same logic that prevented Obama from seating Supreme Court justices. And look how that turned out.

If this was the first ever time it was tried, maybe, but even then, we’d never have anything nice in that case. And we’d never get anything done from August to January in election years, which would also be intensely stupid.

We need to take what we can get, not be all weird about when it happens.

I used to volunteer for planned parenthood and they gave me all sorts of condom goodies to hand out wherever I went. I’m asexual so it was fun for me to swat down men asking if they could use them on me! “Do you want the free awesome condoms, or do you want to piss off the safe sex fairy? That’s what I thought. Go have fun now.”

Around Halloween, condoms taped to a stick like a sucker. Actually year round for fun. Those were always a big hit at parties. “Hey want a sucker? This will make it safe!”

Xmas, they had red and green flavored condoms. Red was peppermint green was fruity.

Going to a convention they would ship me with several hundred glittery shiny package condoms. I had an alligator clip necklace for those shiny bitches. Got so much love for it.

You name it, they did it with condoms. Because why the hell not make it fun??

Sadly I’m too old to social these days (jk I’m just not an event person anymore). Or I’d keep it up for sure.

I don’t have a minds eye for something to fade from, so that question doesn’t really make sense to me. I have my eyes and then when I close my eyes it’s either black or eyelid colored, nothing else, and I’m super unclear what seeing things in your mind is supposed to be like. Tho I do have super-vivid visual dreams these days (which did not happen until my late 20s, but aren’t at all uncommon for people with aphantasia) and because I only have open-eye sight and these dreams that seem totally real, I frequently have to ask people if things actually happened. It’s very disconcerting, but my understanding is that dreams are not really the same as waking minds eye anyway.

Rather than a visual representation, I’ll have a verbal description ready as soon as I see an item. So for the ball example, I’d know the ball is “small, about the size of a plum, solid pink somewhere between neon and intense salmon, smooth matte texture, looks like it might be foam”. It probably serves the same function as a visual representation, although perhaps with a bit more required specificity. I don’t really describe things to myself unless I need to, though, so I guess my thinking is sort of abstract. I know the traits something has, and can recall them, but typically don’t explicitly list them unless I’m describing for someone else.

One perk of this is I’m great at describing things I’ve seen or made up, a downside is I’m terrible when people describe things to me. Since I’ve never seen the thing being described, it is a super arbitrary list of usually non-specific features and I don’t care at all. I skip clothing descriptions in books, for example. Don’t care. But when I describe things, even made up things, I’ll run through a list of the features it needs as a minimum to be the object for my mind, which is usually vivid detail for others, as the ball example above.

Idk if I see things differently eyes-open, I don’t really think so, but that’s always been a curiosity of mine since there’s literally no way to know what other people see. I have mild impairments as a result of not being able to visualize, like I’m largely face blind - I have to pick out specific features and traits and use the combination as identifiers. I get a ton of false positives, and almost everyone “feels familiar”. Beyond that, I’m pretty sensitive to colors and patterns. Idk.

But the -way- you ask that first question makes me curious; If you close your eyes and intentionally picture something other than the ball, would you then be unable to tell me what color it was in your example? Do you, personally, require the visual representation to “know” the object?

Not really, but typically if I can see someone else do a motion I can self-insert the movements I’d need to make to duplicate it, so that might just be a disused function for me.

Although that’s a good question, because I do have special memory that I use for a lot of things, and it involves movement, but maybe not in the same way someone else would (eg I can count the windows in my place by simulating a walk through my house and “opening windows” like I do on nice mornings, but I often forget about out-of-the-way non-opening windows because they aren’t part of my muscle memory)

I’m aphantasic. You can say “picture this” followed by whatever you like. It’s not possible for me in any way. Growing up I honestly thought “picture this” or “close your eyes and see” was just metaphor. I legitimately didn’t understand other people can see things.

My mind has a verbal descriptive stream, and I’m good with muscle-based or proprioceptive spacial memory, and the two combine to handle most things, but nothing visual. So like I can easily describe things from memory or from an idea, and it’ll be fully consistent, but not something I see.

If you have aphantasia, and not just hypophantasia, it makes no difference how much detail is provided, there’s a total, fundamental, inability to visualize things.

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As a kid I would hear “save big money” and would often show a person next to oversized money (like cartoon people next to giant dollars and coins).

I was absolutely under the impression it meant large scale money and found it confusing anyone would want that. It would be so inconvenient!

I’m not sure when I figured it out but it wasn’t an “a-ha!” moment, it just sort of gradually fell out of my brainmeat.

Skindred cd, case of strongbow, few bottles of liquor, promotional pack of jeagermeister swag (metal bar sign, bombshot glasses, thongs, t-shirts), and various other little things.

Customer appreciation golf outing then party night, everyone at the golf outing got raffle tickets (I didn’t go to that), but then got too drunk to keep track of them, so I ended up with like 12 of the winning tickets at the end of the night when everyone was clearing out.

One of my friends brings homemade hot sauce to the bar and gives little tester bottles to people tho.

Oooh I hope in a few years when they go begging we can all agree that if they are too big to fail, they are too big to be a private business.

If I end up with cancer that grows so fast that a mammogram every few years is the only way to catch it in time, then I frankly wouldn’t have great odds anyway.

But to more directly answer your question, I’m actually pretty unlikely to be willing to go through chemo and radiation treatments regardless if it’s a real threat to my life or not. If it can be excised via surgery, maybe, or if some of the new treatments (like the mRNA vax or the preventative vax) would handle it with minimal side effects, I would do that, but otherwise, nope. But surgery is pretty invasive so yes, I do think over-treatment for me specifically would be more harmful than just waiting to see if it gets worse, and then still doing the surgery.

I had parents in the medical field, and most of my deceased family has been taken down by cancers, so I know what I’m getting myself into, treated or not. My mom didn’t even bother with treatment (hospice only), because she spent enough time in oncology and hospice to know the outcomes. I took care of her throughout, and we had a lot of conversations about treatment and the reasoning behind not going that route, but ultimately people who work with cancer patients tend not to seek treatment themselves for a reason. And I tend to agree with their logic, given the current treatment options.

I’ve had gene screening for all known cancer genes and came up clean (tho I still get updates on my unknown mutations every few years). I was and still am fully prepared for a double mastectomy or whatever other surgical interventions if it ever becomes prudent. I do regular bloodwork, regular professional exams, plus I do fairly frequent self-screens (full body), so I’m not doing nothing, I’m just not doing mammograms.

To each their own, and by no means do I think nobody should be screened or go through treatment, it’s just not something I’m personally interested in doing.

Yep, inherited membership from my mother :)

I’ve wondered about that myself, actually, as a card carrying member of the itty bitty titty committee.

I can’t speak for mammography specifically, as I have absolutely zero intention of ever getting one (I take personal issue with how sensitive they are these days, as they frequently find tumors that never would have actually caused a problem because they are very slow-growing, leading to over-treatment) but for self-exams, do be aware that certain breasts can have more or less cystic tissue, which can change the feel of the breast. It’s not related to size, afaik, just your own composition, tho larger breasts have a lot more tissue to spread cysts and tumors through, so they might be more or less obvious.

Thus, self exams (for all Humans) are most valuable when you do them regularly, so you know what your own tissue normally feels like, and you can pick out new lumps and monitor them.

I have a lot of cystic tissue, so my breasts are normally a bit on the firm and lumpy side. Nothing to worry about, but if I didn’t know that was normal for me, I might think it was cancerous.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let_them_eat_cake

Appears not to be the case. I was curious about the full context, and that context is that it almost certainly didn’t actually happen.

I gave mine to my city clerk yesterday. Our drop boxes aren’t out yet, but they still take them.

It’s part of the militarization of everything, and acts as patriotism propaganda.

Not only the anthem, but they usually have armed forces people, equipment, sponsorship, etc. and why it’s such a big deal with athletes don’t fawn enough over it (eg. the take a knee “scandal”)

Sports are a strong recruitment tool, being popular with men throughout their lives, and have been wildly taken over with military propaganda as a result.

I mean yeah, obviously I’m pissed, that’s why I mentioned it. They decided to replace part of my driveway because it had drainage lines or something (idfk) raked into it, it wasn’t even cracked. I feel it’s a gross breach of the social contract. At the same time a lot of the areas I’ve lived have treated the sidewalks as public property when it suits the city and private when it suits the city.

There’s just nothing I can actually do about it other than talk to people about it. A lot of people around here are fine with hurting everyone if it hurts the wrong people and boots them out, like me. They just don’t know they think I’m the wrong people, because I don’t “look” like one of their undesirable classes (tho I fit several unrelated to race). I get to hear all their thoughts about what should happen to people like me, and other “undesirables”.

Nobody even runs against conservatives here. And I mean I would run, but I’m so disgustingly unqualified for public service. I’d probably win just for being an alternative, since we have never had any, but then what?