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No; dicks usually go in an oscilating or pendulous motion, while I simply go down.

Because I felt my wisdom teeth get pulled, and because I identify as a problem.

“Anesthetic awareness.”

A slim beater knife like the Buck 722 Spitfire (had mine for almost a decade).

multi-chambered pill fob; bulk caffeine pills.

A quality water bottle.

Bamboo sheets (soft, smooth, anti-static)

Basic: we want to ensure everyone drinks pumpkin spice White Claws, has a pH of at least 7.1, or is basically healthy. Their choice.

First you do Universal Pet Health, which you push by just talking about how good it would be for dogs and ranch families.

Then you talk about how silly it is that we have UPH, but not UBH, especially when UBH would help with our nation’s combat readiness.

I feel like people could benefit from what I know about Butt Stuff™.

Secrecy under pain of death.

Inscryption.

I am not at liberty to elaborate.

For anyone else who works in these sorts of environments don’t be afraid to buy an aggressive hair net or bandana. If your hair gets entangled you’ll be lucky if a scalping is the most of your injuries.

Part of it is because you still need a gig to keep the retirement funds rolling. You don’t want to live it out on pea soup and bread.

Part of it is because after a certain point every bit of your body, from your bones to your brains, is only available on a Use It or Lose It basis with no warranty for service blackouts.

And part of it is because, and l guess this is due to the collapse of the extended-family model, lots of people don’t have anyone or thing to go home to; they’re divorced or widowed, kids have moved out, and their social network has literally died out.

Towards the end of his life my father only had ONE surviving peer from grade school. Imagine how it is to call your only surviving friend on a regular basis and to wonder, each time, if today’s the day you learn you’ve already heard their voice for the last time.

Too heavy, too integrated into the design. Might as well worry about people stealing your transmission or rack & pinion (TFW: that’s what your car uses to translate ‘turning the wheel’ into turning the wheels).

You may want to take this opportunity to educate your children on the relationships between lifestyle choices, old age, atrophy, and death, but also to ensure they understand that who they see is not who he was.

Isn’t this the stuff that the fascists tried to weaonize in WWII, but it was too dangerous to handle and it, like, burnt down a concrete bunker or something?

You can use your flashlight to find and blind them so they’re easier to hit.