Also one of the defining traits of our species is our propensity to try varied means of social organization. To act like hunter gatherer H. sapiens were all modeling their societies the same way in regards to gendered division of labor flies in the face of what has been observed in the historical and archeological records.

The Dawn of Everything goes heavily into this and is a fascinating book

Funny enough despite being older than a grandparent ever lived to be and losing my mom kinda young, I never do. I already am living like I might die young or might die old. And I always kinda assumed I’d die young, but I don’t say fuck it or assume it’s coming soon. It’s more that I’ve been living as wildly as I care to since my early 20s because if I put it off until I’m older it’s sad, but if it’s just how I live it’s living life to the fullest. All that said, I financially highly value the ability to remain stable through all of life’s hiccups, and I’d rather keep that stability and put off getting to see the Alps, than be a spendthrift.

Just gotta smoke a bunch of cigarettes use some artisinal locally sourced desoxyn.

Yeah ADHD is all in your head, but so is brain cancer.

“This is my health and I’m going to speak about this with a doctor. I love you and appreciate your perspective, but this is my decision to make. If any changes as a result of this impact you, we can discuss them, but I’ve made my decision and I expect you to respect it the same as I respect the decisions you make about your health.”

The fact that she thinks she gets to decide what medications you get to take is nuts to me. This is a boundary it’s very worth building and maintaining. If side effects impact her then you can negotiate, but it’s your body. You have the autonomy to decide what happens to it. She’s just a trusted advisor on the matter of your body.

Snake oil was oil from snakes. Ok well it was advertised as such, the stuff in the bottle had never been a part of any reptile. Patent medicine was just like that, not only was it never what they said it was, what they said it was didn’t do what they said it did.

The way I like to frame it is that no president has a “make gas cheap” button, but they all have a lot of “make gas expensive” buttons. Trump likes pressing those buttons because they aren’t labeled as such

Yeah even pretty far inland you occasionally get a Canuck buck in your change (usually it’s a small coin)

So my father did it, and I don’t think it was intentional, the big thing was that his perspective was to be treated as objective fact in discussions in which he was a part. You could say something like “I’m cold” and he’d respond with “it’s not cold” in a frustrated tone. The long and short of it in how it fucked me up is that I struggle to trust my own subjective reality and feel the need to get permission to feel things. That can be a real problem when it comes time to form and maintain boundaries for example.

Yeah I associate it with uncontrolled BPD and it fucking terrifies me at this point because of the experiences that caused that association. Being put on a pedestal sucks, your successes become expected and your failures become catastrophic. But also you can feel trapped for fear of hurting someone who you do like who’s in a bad place. And from there enforcing boundaries can start to feel like hurting them.

With my wife we still make points to express that we’d be ok and manage if the other left. Our finances are built with that in mind even. Knowing I can leave makes me always aware of how I don’t want to, and it makes us safe and secure in the fact that we know the other doesn’t want to.

With someone coming on too strong too fast you need to keep your eyes open and be aware of your boundaries. It may be someone who’s awesome and sincere who’s just on a different pace than you, it may be an intentional abuser being machiavellian, but it’s also got a pretty good chance of being someone unstable and sincere and oh fucking boy will that cause problems if you don’t have and maintain boundaries.

Yeah it’s a tone indicator “this may be taken as having a serious or upset tone, but wasn’t meant that way” though it also can mean “please don’t be upset” in the case of something like “sorry I disappeared for a bit, life happened lol”

Because in most aspects of human endeavor close to success means try again. You may say that that’s true, but only for games of genuine skill, and yes, but part of why gambling fucks with our brains so much is that for a lot of people that difference isn’t instinctive.

Yeah if your finances are exciting then you’re either taking massive risks or you’re investing in companies that feel it’s worth spending money that could go to investments or dividends to ensure investors are excited. Either way it’s a bad position to be in

Yeah if anything gambling is the hot new addiction for young people. Gen Z drinks less, does less drugs, and even fucks less, but they gamble more. As a millennial I remember when gambling was mostly old people at casinos, but that’s not the face of modern gambling. These days it’s online casinos and sports betting apps. It’s increasingly stuff like polymarket.

The seed they need isn’t just that they’re being spied on, but that it’s personally bad for them when compared to not having the device. Alternatives that may be more expensive, but are safer and within their capacity are also valuable.

This is especially a thing with ring cameras. One thing I do is be very upfront about how despite being a victim of the sort of rare crime that inspires people get them out of fear, I didn’t respond by buying one or a gun, I then explain why and what alternative I’m going with instead. The cops showed me clearly why they can’t be trusted to use camera footage responsibly on behalf of victims when they were loudly demanding answers about my weed bowl but couldn’t be bothered to look at the footprints under the window with a cut screen, instead insisting we’d left the door the invader left through unlocked.

Yeah, like, in raw harm done the catholic church is hard to beat and can only fairly be compared to other extremely large and powerful religious denominations. There’s so much to criticize about it as a force of colonialism and cultural destruction especially in the Americas. And the anti queer and anti woman issues are very real.

But also there’s a core of value there. The magesterium is an educated force of inertia, and sometimes that’s bad, but other times it’s telling peasants not to burn witches because witchcraft doesn’t exist or telling rulers to stop fighting or stop killing their subjects. The church is misogynistic, but it has room for women who don’t want to marry and has a place for a small amount of feminine power. The church has been a force of European imperialism, but all Catholics are supposed to be equal and loving to each other so I was raised to think of myself as part of a global and interracial brotherhood. And that’s without touching on the catholic workers or the corporal works of mercy. Ritual, community, and an interrogated theology with an expectation of education in it also were immensely valuable in my opinion. It was also a link to my heritage and a reason to not let my family fully assimilate.

By contrast my cousins on both sides were protestants and on one side I suspect they were baptist adjacent (but like, my uncle drank) they were just weird about it. One cousin of a cousin asked my parents if he could court my sister when they were like 10, his brother was quiverfull, and their sister was interracially adopted and wound up pretty fucked up by growing up in that environment. And the other side definitely were baptists and the girls weren’t allowed to wear pants, they tried to force my cousin once removed to stay with her husband who beat her and her mom, and their preacher used my great grandma’s funeral as an opportunity to tell us Catholics we were going to hell as the real focus of the funeral (great grandma never willingly joined their religion).

So yeah I’ve got some opinions on baptists. My experiences with protestants in general is that even though there are good protestant sects, when I left catholicism the episcopals probably are where I should have wound up instead of as an atheist for a few years until I became pagan, it’s the way many protestant sects acted, especially towards Catholics that put me off of them as a whole.

Yeah, I’ve had the misfortune of meeting some of them irl. Like, theoretically I’m all for people engaging in informal academics, striving to be more thoughtful, and generally trying to challenge their thoughts and be better. However, these people keep going on insane paths such as inventing a hell based on artificial intelligence using game theory to ensure it gets created and so fucking much race science.

Unfortunately these people are increasingly relevant to everyone’s lives. Sam Altman comes out of it, as did the effective altruism movement and Sam Bankman Freid. They’ve got a strong following in Silicon Valley and have some overlap with the technofascism movement coming out of it.

There’s a community on lemmy to mock them at their craziest if anyone’s interested called sneerclub.

Yeah that’s basically what anyone who knows a lot about the culture that formed in the wake of the fanfic thinks. That and the fact that members of that community are too insufferable for lemmy

No, plenty of replies on here aren’t pedantic at all