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Joined 8 months ago
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Cake day: November 19th, 2023

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  • I’d describe it as sort of 3 layers. The first is practical/everyday things, which are mostly much nicer than being alone, but require attentiveness and communication (learn what your SO doesn’t like doing, and do it. Learn what things are work together projects, and what things are stay out of my way type things for each of you, probably other aspects too) - but once you know how to take care of each other, almost everything is less work, takes less time, and costs less money. Cooking, laundry, cleaning, gardening, repairing things, painting the house are all improved. Decorating and having guests over are harder, at least for me. You have to not fall into the trap of taking the things they do for granted, even when those things are routine.

    The second layer I’d describe is lust/romance, which is sort of easier, except that you must avoid letting things coast too long. You have to dedicate time and effort to discovering new things about each other, and new things you enjoy together. You should still be dating, no matter how long it’s been, and ideally you should both be planning things most of the time. In my relationship, this is usually 1-2 things per month, each.

    The final layer is the emotional/support layer. Almost any time, my wife can seek comfort and support from me in a variety of ways for all kinds of things, and I get the same from her. All the big problems in life are easier when you can share them, so here the benefits are huge. This is the only thing I got basically none of from having roommates or a best friend, or dating. For my situation, there’s basically no downside to this.







  • I tried typing this once before, but kept running into situations were I’m not sure if I’m just being condescending. These are the most obvious reasons this is a selfish and self destructive perspective:

    When you are old, children today will be the only people able to take care of you. Optimizing society so that there are many more old people than young people will create unfair burden on the next generation, and probably lead to horrific suffering for millions of people (probably including you).

    Children are best raised by stable, happy, healthy families, and they are more productive members of society (and happier) when that happens. Because we want the next generation to be happy and productive, aiding today’s parents helps us all tomorrow. Adding financial strain causes many negative effects for families, and therefor for children, and therefor for society at large.

    Unless you are extremely lucky, you probably faced issues in your own childhood that would have been lessened if your parents had more money. Wishing the same, but worse on the next generation is twisted.



  • That estimate is based on assuming that the ratio of matter to light output is the same between galaxies 10 billion years apart in age. The high light output of these young galaxies could also be supermassive stars that burn out very quickly, larger stars typically forming faster than smaller stars, or many other things.

    Blindly assuming a linear relationship between two things, then extrapolating is how you get the Windows loading bar circa 2000.

    Separately, but just as big a potential issue, the data itself may be incorrect. Previous galaxies measured at extreme redshift values were remeasured, and found to have less extreme values. This can be as simple as there aren’t that many photons from these galaxies reaching us, so a short measurement period might not be enough to get an accurate picture.












  • There’s a crucial distinction between someone that wants to have sex, but cannot, and someone that chooses to identify as that. To really become an “incel” in the negative sense, you lose the desire to have sex because being denied sexual contact by others is part of your identity now.

    People that merely don’t find others that are sexually interested in them can do things to help themselves, learn better grooming habits, dress nicer, practice approaching and talking to people, etc. Someone that has adopted the identity of “incel” can only help themselves by changing their perception away from the toxic void they found.