I just overheard a coworker saying “Oh, I would never try that in my life!”, in a discussion of food. (This was about consuming a steak cooked less than medium well). It made me wonder what life is like for those who refuse to try new food, especially those who refuse to try mundane things like fried shrimp.
Why limit yourself? It seems like such a closed-minded way to view food. Help me understand?
EDIT:
I wasn’t going to do this, but I’m tired of replying to people and will post this at the top.
The person that prompted this question is a close-minded piece of crap. He has no sensory issues, just a shitty mindset, with ignorance and prejudice on display with no shame. I have the pleasure of hearing his annoying shit every night.
The knee-jerk reactions I have received from people in this post have had me examine my own knee-jerk reactions, attributing malice to that which may be misunderstanding rather than bigotry or hatred. This is what I am taking away from this post. That even I should take a chill pill every now and again; it’s not all a tragedy.
I will not delete it, because there are some very thoughtful replies that explain different viewpoints, that people took time to type out. It would be disrespectful to them to do that.
Call me what you like. Don’t care. I will not be replying to any other replies.
I reject the tone of this question because I wasn’t given a choice in my sensory issues and you turning it into a mortal judgement about me is fucked up.
It sucks that there’s not more awareness about ARFID. It took me a while to understand it and not judge people (usually autistic people) that have it.
I can’t eat raw veggies, salads and anything stringy. It makes me feel all kinds of bad. I hate the fact, but I can’t help it. I really can’t. Most people don’t believe me. It took me a long time to come to peace with that.
I fully empathize, the same has happened to me.
“Why are you gay?” Meme
I’m sorry that you feel that way. Do you intentionally avoid food because of a narrow-minded world view? Or do you have sensory issues that make it difficult for you to handle certain textures/flavors/smells? I thought I was pretty clear in that I am asking people who avoid food because of prejudice why they do such a thing.
But yeah, this is somehow a moral judgment about you. 🤦🏻♀️
Can you ask a question without judging and insulting the people you’re asking?
🙄
And there’s the response most neuro-typicals give when asked to self reflect. Well done being a stereotype.
Chill, friend. No one was attacking you.
Attacking? No. You were just making insulting assumptions about people different than you and spouting off without thinking. Maybe you’ll do better next time, but this conversation leads me to believe otherwise.
Are you usually this angry? Looking for things to be upset about?
You sound fairly narrow-minded in describing not liking food as a worldview.
Dislike of food is a viceral thing.You normally explore what makes you feel good and rather than defining it. Basically you are a tall person berating people for being short.
For the same reason I wouldn’t willingly get stung by most stinging insects. It’s an unpleasant and unnecessary sensation.
Why do some people feel a need to pressure people to do things that make them uncomfortable? Who am I hurting by choosing what I eat?
Autism.
Textures & temperatures are problematic. I stay with what I know so minimise the chance of freaking out.
Autistic and the total opposite here for home cooking. The (allegedly greater) magnitude of those flavors and textures makes trying new things so enjoyable that it’s worth the risk.
That said, I used to be similar, having a rotation of a few select meals; I’d get “hooked” on a specific food for an unreasonably long time. But nowadays, I get the benefits of both.
I make whatever at home because I know exactly what’s going into it and roughly how it’ll taste, and I’m naturally limited to a few vegan options at restaurants so I can live the dream of having one or two favorites I get every time. It’s a win–win.
Proves again we’re all different. I too am on the side of trying but also need some fixed things.
On the spectrum myself and I am a foodie with an insatiable apetite for new and interesting. My general rule is if it was good enough for them, it’s good enough for me. I don’t always like everything, but I’ll try anything.
I agree Autism too and I always stick with the things I know. Cannot be dealing with unfamiliar textures.
Agree, I’m not a picky eater (but somewhat autistic) and eat basically anything, but there is some texture I can’t, like avocado or liver, I can literally puke.
If I try to eat something I don’t like, I’ll throw up. It’s a waste of money and food, and gross for anyone around me.
deleted by creator
Throwing up because you don’t like the food isn’t the same as an allergy
Bro doesn’t know what an allergy is
Every now and then I’ll eat food that I didn’t like the last time I tried them. I still don’t like pickles, mustard, eggplant, etc. and might never like them. There are other foods I don’t like the texture of, e.g. seafood with rubbery textures. There are other foods I don’t try because they just sound fucking gross, e.g. chicken feet. I understand the arguments for trying chicken feet, but it’s a psychological thing preventing me from trying them. My brain just doesn’t want a fucking chicken foot in my mouth. There are other foods that I’ve tried and might have even enjoyed, but I don’t want to create more demand for that food for one reason or another. I’m fond of ducks. Ducks taste good, but I want ducks to live. I’m increasingly fond of cows, which are delicious, so I rarely eat beef now. I’ve had foie gras and I will never have it again. Geese are assholes but they don’t deserve what humans do to them in order to make foie gras.
I’ll eat my own cum but won’t touch ranch dressing. Do with that what you will.
I… okie dokie.
That’s more than enough information, thank you.
Please, tell me less.
So you don’t spit, eh?
Spitters are quitters.
That’s what I’m saying! Why waste a reward?
You busy later?
I’d rather not have anything to do with that. Thank you.
wasn’t an invitation
Do with that what you will
Wasn’t an invitationI’m getting mixed signals here.
They are obviously ordering you to do with it what you will.
At least you’re not wasteful?
My nickname is ‘Closed Circuit’
OwO
I want to know more, like how did you get over PNC and what does it taste like? Does diet really change the flavour etc etc…
PNC?
Post nut clarity
Oh. Well, first ask yourself do you actually want to do it? If yes, just do it. If no, maybe reevaluate. It seems intimidating at first but just dip your tongue in it. It probably won’t taste great but that’s not why anyone does it. I did it maybe three times before I became a pro at consuming one’s own nut. The first times it was like “wow, this sucks”, afterwards it was more like " wow, this would be better if I had a loving goth mommy domme to share the moment with." It’s not gay despite what shitheads will tell you, unless you want it to be. The world is your oyster, i’m just living in it. As for diet, no idea. Mine has always tasted like battery acid. In regards to PNC, just do it and than you can jerk off thinking about it later.
Disgust is an emotional response. No one can choose their emotions.
Choose? No.
Adjust over time? Maybe.
Jesus Christ the people in the replies to this comment need to get a grip. It looks like Reddit down there, wtf. All of you need to learn to read
Uh, yes, in fact thats one of the truly few things in life that you have absolute choice and power over, is your emotions and how you react to things. Most people learn emotional regulation as children.
That’s arguable. Setting aside determinism or whatever, what it appears we can choose is our actions (in response to our emotions). Not the emotions themselves. I’m not sure I could any more choose to be happy if a beloved pet died than I can choose what my eyes see when I look a particular direction. I might be able to filter those inputs through my own perceptions moments after the experience but that initial reaction is instantaneous and, as far as I can tell, uncontrolled.
Put another way: if some drunk shitbag, flying down the street, runs over my cat - my initial response is going to be some combination of horror, rage and sorrow all wrapped up in a sense of panic. Whatever I choose to tell myself after the fact, in an attempt to alter that state, will be reliant on me convincing myself of it before (or rather if) my emotional state can then change. Maybe I say to myself “at least Mittens was spared the pain of old age, organ failure and a slow death” and that silver lining is enough to curb the rage and reduce the sadness. Maybe it’s not. Either way it’s post hoc to the initial, visceral reaction.
Another example might be what’s humorous to you. Something “dark” or morbid might leave you in a laughing fit where it would leave others aghast. I don’t think either of us can choose that. I certainly can’t choose to find Seinfeld funny.
Why are you conflating an inability to practice emotional regulation in a sudden, horrific event to the same in the topic of conversation: trying unfamiliar foods? Emotional response is a muscle, and while there are certain things which cannot be practiced for, there are absolutely others which are entirely trainable and controllable, barring some massive disability that leaves you unable to function independently in society. Having an aversion to new experiences is absolutely something most people have the tools to cope with, and I say this as someone who is on the AuDHD spectrum.
Why are you conflating…
If you’re struggling to view the reply chain, cytobit used disgust as a specific emotional response. They stated emotions are not something that can be chosen. A_Random_Idiot disagreed. I happened to agree with cytobit so I provided examples where emotions seem to clearly not be a choice.
…inability to practice emotional regulation…
Emotional response…Who exactly is conflating? What you’ve said is in agreement with my position - that one can control, at least to some extent, how they respond to their emotions. What you’re calling “regulation” and “response” seem to be identical, yet neither have to do with controlling or choosing the emotions themselves - which was my only point.
If you need me to tie it back to food, in some parts of the world there is little-to-no concept of animal cruelty - extending to food processing and preparation. If you witnessed, or have knowledge of, what went into the meal in front of you then disgust might be what you feel reflexively. How intensely you feel that, whether or not you empty your stomach, is most likely outside your control. Assuming the reflex is mild enough that you can maintain your composure then what you call “regulation” and “response,” the actions you choose with regard to your emotional state, has a chance to come into play.
I don’t think this is particularly controversial. Emotions are not, so far as I can see, in any way chosen. Emotional response (actions) possibly can be, which you seem to reiterate, but those come after the fact.
Yeah but why should we have to emotionally regulate when it comes to this? As long as food we like is available and we’re getting proper nutrition, why force ourselves to eat what we don’t like?
You absolutely can choose your emotions. It’s sort of terrifying that people seem to agree with this statement.
So when someone you love dies, you can just… choose not to grieve, huh?
You can choose to focus on the positive aspects of their life and your relationship, yes. That’s not exactly the same as not grieving but it isn’t allowing your emotions to drive your actions either.
Either way, that’s quite a bit different than taking a bite of food you don’t like, isn’t it?
You basically just paraphrased that you can’t control your emotions, but how you react to them, proving the previous guys point.
You just paraphrased that emotions aren’t uncontrollable, proving my point.
Somehow, I don’t think you understand what your own point is…
Part of growing up is realising what those emotions mean & adapting, otherwise you will have no growth.
No one can choose their emotions.
Yeah, but most people can still explain where they come from and why they have them.
Most self aware adults anyway.
And you really need to understand, when I use terms like “adults” and “children”, very rarely am I referring to the number of birthdays someone’s had.
it’s called control… and it’s very easily controllable.
Unless you have ARFID
That might be your problem, but it’s no excuse. I have ADD and poor impulse control; that doesn’t entitle me to drive drunk, no matter how good an idea it might sound at the time due to my condition.
Have you ever thought that those are 2 different things? Do you even know what ARFID is or just wrote the first thing you thought when you saw the unknow acronym?
I have ARFID. Lots of tastes and textures are the same as torture for me. It sucks.
I’m a somewhat picky eater, not to the extreme that some are but I do limit myself to foods I am sure I will like.
I’m autistic and have sensory issues. I also have a tendency to throw up a lot. I need to choose safe food that I know won’t make me gag and that I’m sure I can physically eat
Sounds like you’re lucky enough to not have any sensory problems - you probably don’t get overwhelmed by textures, flavours or smells. Not everyone is like that. You also don’t seem to have any particular cultural or ethical concerns about your food choices. My family is vegan and very neurodivergent; none of us would ever consider steak or shrimp, for ethical reasons, and most of us have texture and flavour sensitivities that mean that certain foods are off limits for some of us. We generally buy within those parameters, but some of us really like things others really hate, so cooking can be a nightmare. In many cases, it’s the texture of food that causes this - often borderline textures going from firm to soft, too granular, “wrong” like soft when should be crunchy etc.
But I bet you have some things you wouldn’t try, based on cultural or texture preferences, which some people love. What about…
- Soft biscuits (cookies) - baked crunchy, but have gone damp and soft?
- Dry, stale bread - baked soft, but just dried out and stale?
- Witchetty grubs - moth larvae from Australia?
- Dog meat, eaten in some Asian countries?
- Fermented shark meat, stinky and rank, eaten in some Nordic states?
- Reindeer poo - traditional Finnish cuisine sometimes uses it?
- Natto - stringy, slimy soya beans fermented by a bacteria, very strong flavour, popular in Asia, especially Japan?
- Tempeh - soya beans colonised by a particular edible mould fungus, eaten widely in Asia?
- Tofu - bean curd in various textures, but very little flavour, eaten widely by vegans and in Asia?
- Furry tofu - tofu colonised by another edible mould fungus, eaten widely in Asia?
Pretty much this, I have tried a lot of foods and some of them just make me want to puke just from texture alone. A great example is bean sprouts. Another example is if you put too many chunks of various foods in a rice or pasta dish, I get completely overwhelmed.
I can force myself through the food if I need to, but it’s just a horrible experience akin to being stabbed. It’s not me being closed minded or childish, and I’m tired of people being condescending to me because of this.
Reindeer poo is just candy. Not actual poop.
Why would I force myself to eat something I will not enjoy. I will try a bit but I am not lrdering stuff I don’t like the sound of.
Sometimes the smell which often relates to taste is the first indicator of something tasting not to my liking but if I know I don’t like something (eg mushrooms, I hate those, both taste and texture) I am not willing to try anything involving large quantitiey of said foodstuff
If the texture/flavor triggers my gag reflex and I can’t physically swallow, the question is not “why am I limiting myself?” but rather, “why would I attempt to abuse myself?”
Trying new food can be risky, its not cheap and if you cant eat it you just wasted your money and the food. Food also takes time to prepare which you may not have the time to make or order something else which then can snowball into larger issues. Not to mention the social pressure/judgment to finish a meal you wish you could force down your throat and getting accused of being dramatic and wasteful.
I like to try new foods here and there but I need to be able to get a small portion to avoid waste and know theres a back up I can eat to avoid skipping a meal altogether. It also needs to be with a crowd that I feel safe enough with not to get shat on if I cant eat it.
That being said I can only imagine making a blanket statement that I’d never try something if I already know it’s very similar to something else that I can’t eat.
It sounds like some of the people around you are very rude. No one in my circle would care one bit if you ate something and stopped eating because you didn’t like it. I’m sorry you have people around you that do this.
Its definitely gotten better over the years, especially since ive dropped a lot of friends that reacted like that. I don’t usually get much more than a raised eyebrow anymore over a few more common ingredients.
wHy LiMiT yOuRsElF
You think I want to live like this? That I’m choosing to? Bewildering.
When offered a new food, you can take it or not.
Since you seem to identify as one who would CHOOSE not to eat it, explaining why you MAKE THAT CHOICE is probably more what they were looking for, as opposed to cryptic sarcasm that leaves us with more questions than answers.
Like I said, I don’t choose to be this way. I do wish I could try more things but most foods make me gag before they’re anywhere near my mouth.
You could choose to eat poop, but you would never because that’s disgusting, so would you really call that a “choice”?
Absolutely. And if someone asked why I choose not to eat poop, I would tell them because it’s highly unsanitary and carries diseases. Besides, the flavor is not enjoyable and it provides little to no nutritional value, so there really is no reason to eat it.
Your turn.
That is what you would say if pressed for a reason, but surely it’s secondary to your gut reaction of “ew”. Or perhaps your instinctual knowledge that it’s a bad idea to eat poop causes the gut reaction, I don’t know.
Yeah, if you forced me at gunpoint I’d (probably — I’m honestly not sure) eat whatever you put in front of me, but I normally don’t because the thought, and the sensory impression, are deeply viscerally unpleasant to me. I wish they weren’t, but I very rarely find myself able to overpower this reaction, and only with foods that doesn’t trigger it as strongly. I suppose next you’ll call me weak-willed.
Why are you so intent on me, and only me, justifying myself, because I was a bit snippy to OP or what? I’m disengaging now.
I’m disengaging now
Without answering the very simple question you were asked, by OP and this commenter. Way to engage.
They just answered it…
It seems that the question was not directed at you, based on your response.
You asked “picky eaters of Lemmy” and got a response from one.
Response, yes. Answer, no.
Eh, fair.
I don’t think ARFID is the same thing as “picky”.
“bEcAuSe I dOn’T” is hardly a response. Every other commenter has been able to identify taste, texture, trauma, something. You’re the only one stubbornly insisted “just because” is a valid answer without contributing to the discussion.
No one is contesting your right to be picky, just asking for insight. If you don’t want to share, feel free to stfu anytime.
Growing up, my family has always accused me of being a picky eater, and it comes up every time we’re eating together. Every family get-together, it’s always a big deal whether I’m going to eat the prepared meal or not. My sister especially likes to offer to make a separate meal just for me because I’m “sooo picky!”
I can’t get it through their skulls that I’m less of a picky eater than they are - I’m just vocal about the very few specific foods I decided I don’t like. Which happens to be in a lot of recipes my extended family makes.
I spent 20 years traveling the world with the US military and I made it a point to try local cuisine everywhere I went. I became a bit of a foodie, and some of my favorite foods are from foreign countries. Every time family members came to visit me in other countries, I’d spend half of their visit just introducing them to amazing cuisine in the local area.
We’d eat out practically every day to give them a taste of the local culture. And surprisingly, most of them didn’t care for it. They wanted their “American food” instead. They weren’t very adventurous when it came to trying new things. There’s nothing worse than going to a ramen shop in Japan or a döner shop in Germany and having your family ask if we can go find a McDonald’s instead.
But sure, I’m a picky eater because I’ve hated squash since I was a child, and that’s apparently a staple of every family banquet.
It kinda sounds like they are intentionally putting squash in everything just for the opportunity to pick on you.
I can relate. My mom would make little snide comments about how i was a picky eater and how i would check everything i took out of the fridge.
One time i got sick of hearing it and biting my tongue so i went off.
I told her, her cooking was fucking terrible and she never cleaned out her fridge so there would always be rotting food in there. She was a Brit who grew up in that countries decade long depression.
Hey same, except my mom’s mom went through the depression here in the states and it rubbed off on her.
She loves to call out how particular I am about food, when actually I love trying new foods! I simply don’t like getting food poisoning from whatever hot dish/casserole she made 4 months ago that has been sitting in the fridge. At Christmas one year she brought out canned whipped cream, rediwhip, and it was 3 years expired! I didn’t notice and was sick for a week!
I love squash. Just some yellow summer squash fried up with a little butter, a pinch of salt, and some fresh cracked pepper 👨🍳🤌🫴. I could live on that shit. Sounds like your family has bad taste all around and they were fucking it up. But since you like most food, and mostly just not their food, and they are asking for McDonald’s in fucking Germany, tells me they told you that you’re picky cause you didn’t think a salad should include gummy bears and mayonnaise. It really doesn’t sound like you’re picky.
Local cuisine… takes them to the fast food variants… now if you said introducing them to true local food and they didnt want it…
[…] if you said introducing them to true local food […]
I did. I took my family to locally-owned restaurants, not food chains or fast food places. Just because I mentioned a couple familiar food types doesn’t mean I bought them from a fast food joint. Still, my family didn’t care for them. They wanted recognizable American fast food instead.
In one case, a Japanese friend of mine invited my family over to her parents’ house to have a home-cooked dinner. My family were weirded out by the food and barely ate. It wasn’t even strange foods; they had grilled marinated meats, rice, some local vegetables, etc. My dad did enjoy the sake though.
